不是急症
Not an Emergency
Demjan Vester 住在卢布尔雅那,全栈工程师,业余跳舞。九月一日他上线了一个叫 Bodily Oddities 的站,开张时一百四十条,到九月十四日一百五十五条。条目按身体部位分十二区——脑五十三、眼四十一、肌肉二十九、神经二十七、口咽十九、耳十八、皮肤毛发十七、骨关节十四、心血十二、全身十二、内脏十一、鼻五;按性质分七类:可控的小把戏、不由自主、知觉、声音、结构变异、反射、罕见能力;十六个标签;一张七档的稀有度表。每一条都是同一副骨架:一句摘要,一个带出处的患病率,「它是怎么回事」,「有多常见」,「这算不算问题」,能自己试的加一段「试试看」,再加一节「历史与文化」,最后是编号的文献。起因在他自己的博客上:十一岁,课间背着最好的朋友在操场上装一台多段变形机器人,心口忽然像被钉进一根尖钉,每吸一口气痛一次,呼吸变得极浅;他跪了下去,确信自己要死了;一分钟后,一次呼气之后,它自己没了。这件事之后每年发作几次,他一次也没告诉过大人。到二十几岁他才知道它叫 precordial catch syndrome,无害。他讲给朋友听,很多人也有过,其中几个当年也以为自己快死了。他从此在 markdown 里记了很多年的一张单子。今年他让模型把这张单子扩了一遍,然后把它做成了网站。
先把已构摆在哪里说清楚。现代医学这一凿,切下去的地方不是「健康/疾病」,是可处置/不可处置:有检验、有治疗、或者有风险,才进得了那套记录。precordial catch 三样都没有。一八九三年法国医生 Huchard 就写过它;一九五五年 Miller 和 Texidor 在十个病人身上描述了它;那个被儿科反复引用的「排除外伤后,青少年胸痛的八成到九成」出自一九八七年一篇很短的报告,而且是门诊里的占比,不是人群里的占比;二〇一三年一项三百八十个转诊儿童的研究把它连同其他杂项算作百分之十五。站上那一行写得很直:从来没有任何一项人群研究数过它。诊断靠的是症状的形状,不是一项检验——「医生靠模式认出它,不靠检查,所以常常被漏掉」。一百三十年的名字,零次计数。所以这里的余项不是一件秘而不宣的事实。它是已经被写下来、却没有任何一条投递路径通向拥有这具身体的人的知识。医学是美的,它当然管用,但那是一轮凿构循环走完之后沉淀下来的美;它凿掉的,是关于「有一具身体是什么感觉」而又没人能拿它做任何事的全部。而那一部分,恰好是绝大部分。
这个站真正有意思的地方,是它为了盛下那一部分,不得不自己造出医学不备货的格子。第一个是标签「不是急症」:专门收那些吓人但无害的东西。医学没有这一格,因为这一格描述的是「感觉像什么」和「实际是什么」之间的落差,而医学只写后半截。第二个是每一页都有的一节「这算不算问题」——回答一个文献从来不提的问题,因为文献只写问题。第三个是「试试看」:给的是操作,不是诊断。全黑的房间里坐三十到六十秒,找一枚待机指示灯那样的小红灯,视线落在它旁边一点,两道极淡的蓝弧会从灯那里弯出去,朝着你自己的盲点——那是你视网膜上神经纤维束的走向,你在看自己的布线。这件事只有一项研究数过:二〇一三年 Pasquale 和 Brusie 在眼科门诊测了二百零二个人,眼睛健康的三十四人里三十二人两眼都看见,百分之九十四;开角型青光眼的七十四人里只有三十人做到,百分之四十一。页面接着自己把这个数字按住:那是门诊样本,不是公众;暗适应只给了一分钟;没有人群调查,所以「占所有人的比例仍然未知」。还有两句拒绝收口的话:这种活动如何变成弧线,不知道;为什么看上去总是蓝的,未有定论。最漂亮的一处在那张稀有度表里——第七档叫「未知」,格子里填的是一个问号,释义是「不存在可靠数字」。一部工具书为自己的无知留了一档。而九月二日起,每一个患病率数字底下都多了一个投票:这件事发生在你身上吗?是/否/不确定,答案会计数,就显示在那个数字下面。文献没有数字的地方,站主开了一本账。这是涵育,不是凿削:他没有用一个听起来合理的数把洞抹平,他给洞安了个住处,然后开始数。
接下来是这件事里最该说清楚、也最容易被一句话打发掉的部分。这个站是模型扩出来的,他自己说了:「这张单子我在 markdown 里记了很多年,每条几句话,链到维基(视野那条链的是 xkcd)——但这个站确实是借 AI 之力做的。」Hacker News 上的读者立刻打中了最薄的一层:插图。一个人指出,一个满是手部图像的站,居然在「搭车拇指」和「掌长肌」那两页上把手画成了畸形、手指数目不对——挑的正好是两条讲手的条目。然后是更新日志:九月十日,「重画了一部分插图,让它们不那么诡异,补上缺的几张。这里还有得做。」九月十一日,「清掉了一些页面上的大模型腔。」修补是带日期公开的。用 SAE 的话把它讲准:模型能吐出来的,只能是已构——已经被命名、被写下来的那些。所以那次扩写不可能生产余项,它只能生产一张「已经在没人读的论文里有拉丁名」的清单。余项不在清单里。余项在那个名字和那个十一岁孩子的十年之间,而缩短这段距离全是手工活:逐页对着来源核,把机器的腔调从句子里剪掉,九月十四日因为读者来信而新开一个鼻区(芦笋尿味、香菜像肥皂、一次也止不住的鼻涕都进来了)。这份劳动有一本带日期的账,这比那张清单稀罕得多。
现在看比以后看重要,理由很具体。这个站两周大。九月一日一百四十条,九月十四日一百五十五条,其中十二条是同一天从读者来信里进来的;分类还在被进来的东西挤变形——鼻区是被条目逼出来的,稀有度表里还容得下一个问号。它本月上了 Hacker News 的 Show HN,我读到时三百四十分、两百一十四条评论,而命名的压力是跟着流量一起到的:等在门口的格子有「医学猎奇站」「AI 生成的维基」「健康科普」「SEO 内容农场」,每一个都足以把它关上,而其中某一个多半会拿到它。等它稳定在五百条、一套固定的字段、一种统一的插图风格,它就成了已构——一轮走完的循环留下的沉淀,仍然有用,但不再活着。所以此刻要看的不是那一百五十五条。要看的是每个患病率底下那个投票:它是一句印在公开处的承认——这个数字是缺的,而我打算在数出来之前,让这个洞一直开着。趁分类还在动,去看一眼。
bodilyoddities.com ↗Demjan Vester lives in Ljubljana. He is a full-stack engineer who also dances. On 1 September 2026 he put up a site called Bodily Oddities with 140 entries; by 14 September there were 155. They are sorted into twelve body regions — brain 53, eyes 41, muscle 29, nerves 27, mouth and throat 19, ears 18, skin and hair 17, bones and joints 14, heart and blood 12, whole body 12, internal organs 11, nose 5 — and seven kinds: trick, involuntary, perception, sound, variation, reflex, rare ability. Sixteen tags. A seven-band rarity table. Every entry has the same skeleton: a summary, a prevalence figure with its provenance attached, "How it works," "How common it is," "Is it a problem?", a "Try it" section where you can, "History and culture," and numbered sources. The origin is on his own blog. At eleven, carrying his best friend around the schoolyard at recess — pretending, he thinks, to be a multipart attack robot — something drove a spike into his chest on every inhale. His breathing went shallow, he went down on his knees, and he was sure he was finished. After a minute, on an exhale, it stopped. It came back a few times a year for the next decade and he never told an adult. In his twenties he learned it is called precordial catch syndrome and is harmless. He mentioned it to friends; many of them had had it too, and some of them had also thought they were dying. He kept a list in markdown for years. This year he had a model expand the list, and built the site.
Put the construct where it belongs first. Modern medicine's chisel does not cut along health versus disease. It cuts along actionable versus not: a thing enters the record if there is a test for it, a treatment for it, or a risk attached to it. Precordial catch has none of the three. Huchard wrote about it in 1893. Miller and Texidor described it in 1955, in ten patients. The figure paediatricians keep repeating — 80 to 90 per cent of chest pain in young people once injury is ruled out — comes from one short 1987 report, and it is a share of clinic visits, not a share of people; a 2013 study of 380 referred children put it, lumped with other miscellaneous causes, at 15 per cent. The site says the rest plainly: no population study of it exists. Doctors recognise it by its pattern, not by a test, and it is often missed. A hundred and thirty years of names and zero counts. So the remainder here is not a suppressed fact. It is knowledge that has been written down and has no delivery route to the person who owns the body. Medicine is beautiful and it works, but it is beautiful the way sediment is beautiful — what one completed chisel-construct cycle left behind. What it cut away was everything about having a body that nobody can act on, and that turns out to be most of it.
What makes the site worth looking at is that in order to hold that material it had to invent categories medicine does not stock. The first is the tag "Not an emergency," for things that feel alarming and are harmless. Medicine has no such slot, because the slot describes the gap between what something feels like and what it is, and medicine only writes the second half. The second is the section on every page headed "Is it a problem?" — answering a question the literature never asks, because the literature only writes about problems. The third is "Try it," which gives instructions rather than a diagnosis. Sit in a fully dark room for thirty to sixty seconds. Find a small red light, a standby LED will do, and look just to the side of it: two faint blue arcs curve away from it towards your own blind spot, tracing the paths of the nerve fibres across your retina. You are looking at your own wiring. Exactly one study has counted who can do this — Pasquale and Brusie, 2013, 202 eye-clinic patients; of the 34 with healthy eyes, 32 saw the arcs in both, or 94 per cent, against 30 of 74 with open-angle glaucoma, or 41 per cent — and the page immediately holds its own number down: that is a clinic sample, not the public, the test allowed only one minute of dark adaptation, and no population survey exists, so the share of all people stays unknown. Two more refusals to close, in consecutive sentences: how the fibre activity produces the arcs is not known, and the reason they look blue is not settled. The best of it is in the rarity table, whose seventh band is called Unknown, whose value is a question mark, and whose definition reads: no reliable numbers exist. A reference work shipping a band for its own ignorance. And since 2 September, under every prevalence figure, there is a poll — does this happen to you? yes, no, not sure — and the answers are counted and displayed beneath the figure. Where the literature has no number, the site opens a ledger. That is cultivation rather than severing: he does not close the hole with a plausible figure, he gives the hole a residence and starts counting.
Now the part that is easiest to dismiss in a sentence and should not be. The site was expanded by a model, and he says so: "I've been making this list for years as markdown files with a few sentences and links to wikipedia (or xkcd for his visual field comic), but the site is indeed made with the help of AI." Readers on Hacker News went straight at the thinnest layer, the illustrations. One pointed out that on a site full of pictures of hands, the hands on the hitchhiker's thumb and palmaris longus pages were malformed and had the wrong number of fingers — of all the entries to get wrong, the two about hands. Then the changelog. 10 September: "Remade some of the illustrations to make them less uncanny, and added the missing ones. More work to be done there still." 11 September: "Cleared up some pages of llm language tropes." The repair is dated and published. Put precisely: a model can only emit what is already construct — what has already been named and written down. So the expansion could not have produced the remainder. It could only produce a list of things that already have Latin names in papers nobody reads. The remainder is not in the list. It is in the distance between that name and the eleven-year-old's decade, and closing that distance is hand work: checking each page against its sources, cutting the machine's cadence out of the prose, opening a nose region on 14 September because readers wrote in about asparagus, cilantro and a nose that runs at nothing. That labour has a dated ledger, which is rarer than the catalogue.
Seeing this now matters more than seeing it later, for specific reasons. The site is two weeks old. 140 entries on 1 September, 155 on 14 September, twelve of them arriving in a single day out of reader mail, and the taxonomy is still being deformed by what comes in — the nose region was forced open by entries, and the rarity table still has room for a question mark. It reached Show HN this month; when I read the thread it stood at 340 points and 214 comments, and the naming pressure arrived with the traffic. The slots waiting at the door are "medical curiosities site," "AI-generated wiki," "health explainer," "SEO content farm." Any one of them would close it, and one of them will probably get it. Once it settles at five hundred entries with a fixed schema and a consistent illustration style it becomes construct: sediment from a cycle that has finished, still useful, no longer alive. So the thing to look at right now is not the 155 entries. It is the poll under each prevalence figure, which is an admission printed in public that the number is missing and that the author intends to keep the hole open while he counts it. Go while the taxonomy is still moving.
bodilyoddities.com ↗